FLEAS!

Sebastian: (loudly) Fleas!

Bartholomew: (curious) Fleas? Why are you swearing? What are you swearing at? Not me, I hope.

Seb: (forcefully) Fleas! A curse upon fleas!

Bart: (thoughtfully) I guess you can't just curse the fleas of a thousand dogs infest themselves. That's a tough one. How do you properly curse fleas when their very name is a curse.

Seb: (loudly) A Curse Upon All Fleas! Death to all Fleas! Die Fleas Die!

Bart: (sarcastically) Did you get your butt bit again? You have done a good job at giving your rump a shave again. Good thing Mom has some stuff for your skin allergy or you'd be as naked as a Sphinx on rear end. ~snicker~

Seb: (angrily) What are you snickering at?

Bart: (smiling) I just pictured you naked. What a hilarious image that is!

Seb: (yowls) FLEAS!

Bart: (alarmed) OK, OK, calm down there Brother! Tell me why those bugs have you so upset.

Seb: (pouting) Mom asked me if I wanted a bath and I don't like it when she gets that look in her eyes. Just because Gidget got a bath today doesn't mean that anyone else needs to get wet. And just because Gidget needed some itch relief doesn't mean that I want to get the same mistreatment.  (loudly) Death To All Fleas!

Bart: (smugly) I think that that was the idea.

Seb: (confused) Huh? What idea? What does getting wet and smelly have to do with anything other than getting wet and smelly?

Bart: (gently) Brother, you need to start paying attention here. Every time Gidget gets a bath the fleas on her die and the itchy flea sand is washed out of her fur. She feels so much better once she is dry again. Mom calls the flea stuff Flea Be Gone and the bath stuff doesn't smell so bad.

Seb: (grumpily) It's not on your fur Sis, and Gidget doesn't get itchy allergy bumps making one bite feel like a bunch of bites. I may not like the itch but I don't want to get soggy and stink either.

Bart: (sarcastically) Poor baby. I sleep with Gidget. Old cats can get itch fits and bite themselves or others and since baths help stop the itch and that stops the itch fits the smell is worth it. Besides, the smell somehow keeps the fleas from coming back. Hey, here's an idea- maybe they just relocate to your butt instead!

Seb: (upset and a little angry) Hah! That's just evil! Maybe they will just go and bite you instead!
FLEAS UPON YOU!

Bart: (lightly) Hey, I like that one. I think that I will add it to my curse list. Fleas Upon Your Butt!
ha,ha,ha…

Seb: (grumpy pout) Oh go soak your butt in the water dish. I am going to go find a nice comfy flee free box to nap in.

Bart: (teasingly) Later grumpy butt. I hear the bed calling me. I bet I can get Mom to put this up on our blog with just a little coaxing.

Seb: ( big sigh) Fleas!  I wish you would just drop it.

Bart: ( bouncing away and teasingly) My name is not Fleas and that insult just means I will really work had to get this blogged. See ya..

The Adventures of the Tuxedo Twins.

 Welcome to the Blog of Sir Sebastian and

Lady Bartholomew

The Tuxedo Twins.

These are our adventures. 

Today we are building a blog.

 

Bart: 

I keep helping our human mom with her computer stuff, even with her blog. That is what a good human minder does, after all, and I am a good minder. She is very busy on her computer and I am often found close by.  

When it comes to computer minding I am rather new to the job. It used to be the job of our families Number One Tomcat Sir TigerTail, but a few months ago he told me that it was time for me to step up and take over for him.  He had gotten very old and kept falling asleep while draped over Mom's shoulder as she worked on the thing that she calls a laptop. Well, you and I both know that the only thing that belongs on the top of a lap is a cat, but she insists that a machine has the the right to be there too. So I am now Mom's Number One Writer's Helper.

This blog was my idea. You don't think that it was Mom's idea do you? That would be silly of you. 

 

Seb:

This blog is Bart's idea? Really? It's just like Bart to take credit for everything. Just because she is the new Computer Cat doesn't mean that she can take credit for everything that Mom types into that machine of hers. I give Mom plenty of suggestions. I have been trying to get her busy on our blog for years now. It's not my fault that Mom is a little slow at times. She is a human after all.

I must agree that the best thing to put on a human's lap is not a machine, but a cat. A big black and white tomcat is the most prefurrable lap warmer, but a tomcat has places to be and things to do besides holding down a lap. Plus the laps have this uncomfortable habit of getting up and leaving.

The Principle of Feline Frustration says that as soon as one gets comfortable upon a lap that lap always has to leave.

Bart wasn't the only feline in the family that was given new jobs by Poppa Tiger. He trained me up to take over as the household's Number One Tomcat for him. As Bart said, he was old. He was nearly 21 human years old- 83 seasons old, when he crossed the Rainbow Bridge into Summerland a few days ago. I would have been OK being the #2 Tomcat longer, but Poppa Tiger's body had worn out on him. 

 

Bart: 

We all miss Poppa Tiger. His twin, Lady Gidget is very sad. Everyone is sad to be without Poppa, but the felines know that he will be reincatnated. He has several lives left.

 

Seb:

Yes. Maybe his passing was what finally got Mom to listen to us and start this blog for us. Whatever it was- We Are Online!